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What kind of time should couples spend together in the early stages of a relationship?The answer turns on what you are trying to find out about this person at this stage of things.This is not the only way the early part of a relationship might look.These are simply suggested applications of biblical principles.Before continuing with this column, please review the preamble included at the beginning of this series, "Biblical Dating: How It's Different From Modern Dating." * * * PART 3: Just Friends » As Christians in dating relationships, we want to avoid hurting one another and dishonoring Christ by "defrauding" (see NASB translation of 1 Thessalonians 4:6) our brothers and sisters in Christ by implying — through word or action — a higher level of commitment to that person than we have made before God.Because this sort of (perhaps unintentional) deception is a particular temptation in a dating context, we need to be deliberate about avoiding it.
There are instances in which you can be genuinely unsure about a guy but still move forward this far.
From there, you obviously need a response from the woman to know whether or not things will go any further.
If you know the woman from church, if you've seen her interact in a group, observed her with others, maybe worked with her as a part of some ministry, that input should be enough for you to think through the decision of whether initiation of a relationship is the right thing.
If nothing else, treating men who initiate well will encourage other men to initiate.
If we are concerned about defrauding one another (again, this idea applies to both genders but particularly to the men as the initiators), another one of the early issues to address is how much and what kind of time couples spend together.